What Can We Do About Psychopaths?

On my long trip from Maine to Seattle for Green Fest, I read journalist Jon Ronson’s new book, The Psychopath Test, about psychopaths in our society. It was a fascinating, unsettling read by a exceptional writer. That Ronson can take a grisly subject like psychopathy and actually fill it with witty and pleasurable-to-read writing is quite a feat. Ronson is never one to research a subject from afar; for him, a book on psychopaths requires intimate and indepth contact with psychopaths. Which means we readers have an inside view into such minds.

The title of the book comes from a checklist of questions that comprise a psychopath test created by Canadian psychologist Robert Hare. Hare’s study of psychopathy reveals enough consistency that if someone scores high on the test they are likely to be psychopathic, without conscience or the kinds of fears that “normal” people have. They are, he attests, not curable or treatable.

And this creates a thorny problem. If psychopaths are not curable or treatable, and if, as the book reveals, they make up one percent of the general population, 25% of the prison population, and scariest of all, four percent of those at the top of the corporate ladder, we have a big problem. Psychopaths appear normal, but without conscience, with no restraints on causing harm and suffering to others; and, with honed manipulative skills and a penchant for pathological lying, they wreak havoc. When they are in positions of power (as corporate, religious, media, or political leaders), they harm thousands, even millions. A psychopathic criminal who rapes, mutilates, and kills stirs our terror, but their victims are far fewer in number than those skilled, but still psychopathic Wall Street moguls, religious manipulators, government leaders, and media heads.

And because humanity is easily manipulated, swayed, and susceptible to influence (note the Milgram and Stanford Prison experiments and the brown eyes/blue eyes exercise), the potential for harm by psychopathic manipulators is even greater.

So what to do?

It will come as no surprise to readers of my blog that my best suggestion is this: humane education that is dedicated to teaching critical and creative thinking skills and fostering reverence, respect, and responsibility. Only when we have these skills honed, practiced and employable 100% of the time, are we able to discern misleading and manipulative words and behaviors. These skills are hardly foolproof, but they are a good start. When psychopaths mastermind religious, political, media, and economic control, and an easily manipulated populace blindly follows – as we so often do – we should not be surprised by the outcomes. When a generation truly taught to be investigative thinkers, to deeply self-reflect, to understand connections between behaviors and outcomes, to be system-analyzers and system-changers, and to hold fast to their deepest values, which they are taught from the earliest ages to cultivate with conviction, then there is hope that that powerful 4% of conscience-less people will not go unchecked.

I recommend Ronson’s book for a fascinating, albeit disturbing, view into the mind of psychopaths and to hone your own skills in recognizing psychopathy for your sake and the sake of our world. And I recommend the resources and programs at the Institute for Humane Education for training in this field that offers real hope for combating the power of psychopaths in our midst.

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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My Failure to Live By the MOGO Principle on Flight 35

This past weekend I had a long trip ahead of me to Seattle for Green Fest. Although thrilled by the opportunity to speak on the main stage about humane education, I was dreading the travel. In the best case scenario, I would have a 17 hour trip, with three separate flights and a five-hour layover in Boston. Plus I was stuck in a middle seat across the country.

When, about an hour from Portland, Oregon, a flight attendant asked if there were any medical personnel on board, I didn’t think much of it. I’ve been on lots of flights when this question has been asked, and it’s never been a big emergency. This time, however, it was. A man a few seats behind me had had a heart attack. Within minutes, he was laid in the aisle as two doctors tried valiantly to save him with CPR and oxygen. For 25 minutes they worked, shouting things as he flat-lined, contorting themselves in the aisle and standing on seats and armrests to position themselves properly during a choppy flight.

We made an emergency landing in eastern Washington, and the EMTs came on board and dragged the man down the aisle and off the plane on a cloth stretcher, but when I spoke to the doctor who was performing CPR on him (a cardiac anesthesiologist), he said that the man wasn’t going to make it.

And while we were a quiet group of passengers who didn’t interfere, intervene, or get riled up ourselves, we were also strangely unengaged. I talked to the two men on either side of me about what was happening, but as I felt tears ready to stream down my face, I quickly suppressed them. That a man was dying in our midst and the best we could do was sit quietly, was surreal. And even as I felt helpless and horrified, I also felt myself focusing selfishly on the delay in the flight and worried that I wouldn’t make it to Seattle that night. And then I found myself horrified that I could even be thinking about that while a man lay dying.

When I missed my connecting flight – the last to Seattle that night – I did my utmost to ensure that I got in line quickly to get a hotel, and took a seat at the front of the hotel van so that I could get in line quickly for a room at the hotel desk. I had a long weekend of tabling and speaking ahead of me, and I knew I’d be sleep-deprived enough without waiting in a long line for a bed for the night. The New Yorker in me came out in no time. And indeed, I was near the front of the line, and, it turned out, the last to be able to check into that particular hotel. The doctor who had worked to save this man’s life was one of many who would be transferred by the van to another hotel to wait in another line, only to awaken in a few short hours to continue his trip for a conference in Vancouver. I never even thought to let him take my spot. I regret that. I regret my lack of generosity. Oh, I had my big emotional reaction, sobbing the next morning as I thought about this man’s death, but I couldn’t even muster enough gratitude for this doctor’s efforts to give him a room sooner the night before. Granted I, too, had a big day and weekend ahead of me, but really. He had tried to save a man’s life, while I sat quietly in my seat following instructions.

So now on my flight back home, I’m doing a bit of soul-searching. I’m thinking of the MOGO principle – to do the most good and the least harm to myself, other people, animals, and the environment – a principle I try to live by. I put myself ahead of everyone else when I disembarked that night; I did not live by a principle I profess to hold dear.

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

Image courtesy of sylvar via Creative Commons.

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Why We Need Humane Education: May 21 and the Failed Rapture

Six p.m. came and went and no rapture on May 21. It seemed that almost everyone I talked to that weekend knew about Reverend Camping’s prediction. And most of us laughed it off. After months of media attention, billboards, emails, tweets, discussions on Facebook, and more, we could be snarky about such a silly prediction. And so the jokes ensued. My husband joked that I’d better not be on a plane that day in case the pilots were raptured in flight. I made my own jokes the morning of May 22 to our staff at the Institute for Humane Education, and we agreed that with no rapture forthcoming, we’d have to keep working on fixing the world.

But the more I think about this whole hoopla, the more unsettled by it I feel. Camping preyed on people’s gullibility and vulnerability. And those who believed and spread his message did likewise. And the media gave this silliness attention, so we all knew about it. Who knows how many people gave up their jobs, spent their life savings, and changed their lives in anticipation of rapture, only to have rent to pay and food to buy and lives to continue? It’s easy to think that it serves them right for being so foolish, but this is who we are as humans – easily manipulatable and eager followers (as the Milgram and Stanford prison experiments and the brown eyes/blue eyes exercise reveal).

Once again, there is a solution to this sort of thing: humane education. We must educate youth to use their minds, their reason, their critical thinking capacities, and their ability to research, investigate, inquire and learn. Only when we are able to think clearly and rationally can we hope to keep at bay the brainwashing, influences, and manipulations that come our way constantly: through media, advertising, religious crusaders, and politicians who prey on our emotions and create a fervor of (pick one or more): fear, rage, and/or greed, while simultaneously fostering self-aggrandizement and overconfidence in what has been fed to us as “truth.” Fear-mongering and hatred and the instigation of rage come from both left and right. We are preyed upon as much by the purveyors of beauty products endlessly generating self-doubt as we are by pundits on opinion shows encouraging us to hate others and to feel empowered when we follow their true path, and equally by religious zealots telling us what to believe, as Camping did.

Before we scoff at Camping’s “silly followers,” let’s remember how susceptible we all are to influencers and manipulators (even when we think we are not). And let’s commit to educating the next generation to have the skills they desperately need (and which the world desperately needs) to think well and clearly for a healthy world for all.

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

Image courtesy of Analogick via Creative Commons.

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Gratitude in the Midst of Catastrophe

I received the spring issue of Thirty Thousand Days, the journal of the ToDo Institute, and found tears streaming down my face as I read the post-earthquake/post-tsunami reflections of Yuka Saionji, friend of the ToDo directors, who lives in Japan. I wanted to share some of those reflections with readers of my blog. Enjoy and pass along:

“Last night when I was walking home (since all traffic had stopped), I saw an old lady at a bakery shop. It was totally past their closing time, but she was giving out free bread. Even at times like this, people were trying to find what they can do, and it made my heart warm.”

“In the supermarket, where items of all the shelves fell, people were picking up things so neatly together, and then quietly stood in line to buy food. Instead of creating panic and buying as much as needed, they bought as little as they needed. I was proud to be Japanese.”

“When I was walking home, for 4 hours, there was a lady holding a sign that said, ‘Please use our toilet.’ They were opening their house for people to go to the restroom. It was hard not to tear up when I saw the warmth of people.”

“An old man at the evacuation shelter said, ‘What’s going to happen now?’ And then a young high school boy sitting next to him said, ‘Don’t worry! When we grow up, we will promise to fix it back!’ While saying this, he was rubbing the old man’s back. And when I was listening to that conversation, I felt hope. There is a bright future on the other side of this crisis.”

“At Disneyland, they were giving out candies. High school girls were taking so many I was thinking, ‘What???’ But then the next minute, they ran to the children in the evacuation place and handed it to them. That was a sweet gesture.”

“In Korea, a Japanese man got a cab ride and when it was time to pay, the driver refused and said: ‘You are Japanese, yes?’ Yes. ‘When you go back to Japan, please donate the fee.’ Beyond nationality or politics, we are all the same.”

In gratitude,

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

Image courtesy of cheerytomato via Creative Commons.

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Lightening Up and Letting Go: Learning From Fighting Dogs

Yesterday afternoon, two of our dogs, Ruby and Elsie, got into a fight. They’ve been fighting periodically over the past 5 months, and each fight has gotten worse. I had thought that their last fight, well over a month ago, was the final battle, and that they’d worked things out. Basically, Elsie, now an adolescent, has begun to irritate Ruby, soon to turn 8. When we first adopted Elsie, who was around 6 months old, she was like a fountain of youth for Ruby. The two played and played, and we were delighted that Ruby had a best friend, sister, and playmate.

But this year, Elsie’s been pestering Ruby, sidling up next to her, on her tail, challenging her status as queen bee in our household, and Ruby has been voicing her displeasure by growling. Elsie doesn’t take the hint, and Ruby has attacked her half a dozen times. The first couple of times Elsie barely fought back, but yesterday, she fought back hard. Usually, I let them work it out and no one is hurt; but this time, they wouldn’t stop. I tried everything I could think of: yelling at them, tossing a sheet over them, throwing their stainless steel dog bowls, and finally getting a broom. The broom worked. I got them apart. We were all shaken.

And when this happened, my husband and I were soon to hit the road to drive to Massachusetts to watch our son’s breakdancing performance at school, and I didn’t want to leave our housesitter to handle any fallout from the fight. So I called the motel where we’d be staying and asked about bringing Elsie. They said yes.

Elsie traveled for six hours, four hours longer than the longest road trip she’d ever been on with us, arriving at a strange motel room to spend the night. She seemed a bit anxious, but she cozied up in the bed and fell asleep. In the morning we went to the school to watch the performance and stopped to take Elsie for a brief walk in the rain. A carpet of pink flower petals lay on the ground and Elsie lay among them, a beautiful sight. A balm after the storm that had precipitated her joining us.

A couple of hours later we were back on the road home. Elsie was a good traveler, confused though she must have been. When she and Ruby saw each other upon our return they were wary. Elsie slinked into the house, obviously worried. But then they ran outside – where they are always best friends – before coming back in and slipping into their uncertain patterns in the house. Ruby growling quietly; Elsie refusing to back off.

I hope there won’t be any more big fights. I hope that Elsie will stop challenging Ruby’s status in our household, or if she simply must be the alpha, that Ruby will let go as she ages. I hope that Elsie will learn not to be such a pest around Ruby, and that Ruby will just lighten up.

As I write these words, I find them familiar. I see the ways I, too, can be a pest in my family (like Elsie), and the ways I, too, can be inflexible around my likes and dislikes (like Ruby). I see the ways in which as much as we love one another, we, too, can fight (although we do so with words, not teeth). I see the ways in which we each seek control in different forms and styles and the ways in which lightening up would be just the solution to many a conflict.

Maybe if I work on my own behavior, Ruby and Elsie will miraculously solve their behavioral challenges, too.

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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What It Will Take to Change the World

Many years ago, when I was stuck in traffic, a cyclist zoomed by me. I’d just added a new bumper sticker to my car that read, “Earth’s best friend is vegetarian.” I thought it was rather witty, with its graphic of the Earth in the shape of an apple, and I personally considered myself far ahead of the proverbial curve, because I was promoting my personal animal protection goal to a wider audience of environmentalists. I even felt a wee bit smug about just how well I could make connections between issues and teach others about what I knew and they didn’t.

As the cyclist sped by, he yelled into my open window, “Earth’s best friend is a bike rider!” He wasn’t very friendly when he shared this. And he disappeared so quickly, without my having the opportunity to educate him about soil erosion, water pollution, depleted aquifers, greenhouse gases, fuel consumption – all caused in large part by animal agribusiness. How little he knew, and how much I had to teach him! Alas, he was gone before I could offer enlightenment (or defend my need for a car).

That bumper sticker is long gone. I realized it didn’t quite work. The sticker was smug, even self-righteous. It promoted a single act – vegetarianism – as best for the planet. Not that vegetarianism, veganism, or eating locally grown foods aren’t extremely helpful choices, but telling others what is the best choice is long gone from my activist/educator repertoire.

What the world – human and nonhuman animals and the Earth itself – urgently needs are activists and citizens who balance committed, confident energy with humility, and passionate, creative effort with wisdom. Our world is desperate for those who are willing to uncover every stone in an endeavor to understand the connections between all forms of oppression and destruction, who are eager to see problems from multiple angles, who want to work together listening and learning from each other, who steadfastly refuse to accept or promote simplistic answers to complex problems, and who diligently strive for visionary solutions that help everyone.

Slowly but surely, such people are surfacing. They are like the baseball players emerging out of Ray Kinsella’s corn field in the movie, Field of Dreams, coming because they are compelled to leave something behind that doesn’t work for a better vision that will, forming a new team neither they nor anyone else set out to create, one that doesn’t confine them to playing a specific position in a predetermined game organized by others who call the shots.

Some of these emerging players are young adults disillusioned by the polemics of organizations, institutions, and the media that focus on either/or solutions to multifaceted issues. Some are teachers scared for the next generation and despondent when misguided laws like the U.S. No Child Left Behind Act fail so dismally to live up to their own visionary titles. Some are CEOs of multinationals or politicians who realize what the future holds if they do not step up to the plate as true leaders. Some come when they suddenly see and are horrified that we’re losing our democracies to corporatocracies. Others appear when they discover they can’t afford, or even obtain, local, organic foods to feed to their families.

When they arrive some, like architect William McDonough and chemist Michael Braungart, authors of the book, Cradle to Cradle, construct buildings and products that aren’t simply less bad, better at fuel efficiency, or more eco-friendly, but which are actually ecologically regenerative and restorative. Some, like Wangari Maathai, plant trees that blossom not only into restored and sustainable ecosystems, but also into democracy and empowered women. Some start community gardens to feed themselves and their neighbors, rich and poor. Some become stealth adbusters, using marketing tools to expose underlying systems of manipulation that have become the norm on Madison Avenue.

These people are engineers and scientists, nurses and electricians, parents and shop owners, artists and accountants, priests and rabbis. They are independent thinkers who see interdependency as part and parcel of the creation of a better world. They may work on separate pieces of the complicated puzzle, but they never forget how their piece is linked to the whole.

It is these people and the hundreds of connections they make, the ways in which they learn from and teach one another, and the revolution they are launching that is the real hope for the world. They are flocking to festivals, conferences, and workshops that link human rights to environmental preservation to animal protection to religion to business to democracy to the media to politics. They are bringing these interconnected issues to rotary clubs and boardrooms, villages and parliaments. It is these people and the ideas they generate that are producing brilliant, cutting edge solutions grounded in root causes and linked to broad, positive effects.

Perhaps you are part of this growing revolution. Perhaps you’ll bring your voice to the hugely diverse, but harmonic chorus that is echoing everywhere. Perhaps you’ll bring your passions and skills to bear on the enormous, but glorious work that is ahead of us. I hope so. As for me, I wish I could go back in time and smile at the cyclist who road by me and say, “Yes, please share with me what you know! Together let’s protect this beautiful Earth and all its inhabitants. I promise I’ll stop being so smug.” If you’re reading this, long ago cyclist, email me and let’s do what it takes to change the world before it’s too late.

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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Creating a Culture of Empathy With Humane Education: An Interview With Zoe Weil

For my blog post today, I wanted to share an interview I did with the Culture of Empathy Project, talking about empathy, compassion, and humane education.

For a humane world,

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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Claude and Medea Now Available on Kindle

I don’t know if all authors have a favorite among their books, but I do. It’s Claude and Medea: The Hellburn Dogs, which follows the exploits of its 7th grade protagonists, as they become clandestine activists in my hometown of New York City. Claude and Medea solve the mystery of a rash of Manhattan dog thefts and rescue the dogs from an evil vivisector. It was quite fun to write, and the feedback I’ve gotten from kids who’ve read it has been wonderful. A few have told me that it’s their very favorite book. Then the book won the Moonbeam gold medal for juvenile fiction, which was quite an honor.

I’ve just been informed that the book is now available on Kindle, and I wanted to spread the word. Please let others who might be interested in this book know.

Happy reading,

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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Compassionate Communication for the Planet: Asking People to Pick Up Their Butts

Ever since I was in high school, if I saw someone throw their cigarette on the ground, I responded. Sometimes I would pick it up and hand it back to them and say, “Excuse me, you dropped this.” Sometimes I would honk if I was behind someone who threw their butt out the window. (And once, stopped as we were at a red light in Philadelphia, the driver got out, picked it up, ran to my car, and apologized to me.)

I was recently in Florida, and I saw a man throw his butt on the sandy ground at the hotel before ascending the steps to the outdoor bar. I called out to him saying, “Excuse me, would you mind picking up your cigarette butt and throwing it in the trash?”

He was miffed, but he walked over and bent to pick it up, commenting that he wasn’t the only one (there were several butts on the ground). I said I knew, but that I’d seen him throw his on the ground. He got very testy and leaned towards me with the butt at my face saying, sarcastically, that he’d love to do that for me.

I walked away, shakily, wondering if my efforts had done any good.

I thought about Kim Korona, one of the graduates at the Institute for Humane Education who speaks so kindly and compassionately to people. I wondered if she would have spoken to this man, and if so what she would have said, and what his response would have been.

I reflected upon my goal. Truth be told, for years my comments stemmed more from my irritation that smokers don’t consider throwing their butts on the ground to be littering (and this made me mad), than from a sincere desire to use the wisest, most effective means to keep the planet from being trashed. I could just remove the butts myself, if my goal was simply to keep that inch of ground from being littered. But my comments were meant to wrong, and perhaps embarrass, the person. But now my motivation is deeper. I’m trying, in my own way, to be a humane educator all the time, and this means attempting to use my best communication skills to convey the importance of treating ourselves, each other, other species, and the environment with respect. My hope is that in speaking to someone, he or she will be less likely to litter, more likely to consider the consequences of their choices. Perhaps this is naïve, but I feel like I have to try, and now I make every effort not to let my irritation seep into my voice and comments.

What, if anything, would you have said or done? What is MOGO (most good) in this situation?

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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Baghdad Cafe: Making the Impossible Real

My husband and I recently watched the indie film, Baghdad Café. I complained during the beginning that the film seemed boring and that we should watch the other Netflix film about the Galapagos that had arrived. Fortunately, I was too tired to actually get up and bring the Galapagos DVD over to the computer, and so we stuck with Baghdad Café. I’m so glad. It’s an unlikely and quirky film. The characters are not really believable, and nor is the premise, but by the end I didn’t care. I loved the message: Anything is possible. We are capable of so much more than we usually dare to imagine, and if we just dared, who knows what could happen.

Unlike many films these days in which the end is dark and uncertain (or in which there is really no end at all), this film is deeply satisfying. It offers no pat ending, but rather the possibility of more happiness and achievement to come. Jasmin and Brenda, the protagonists in Baghdad Café outstrip our expectations. What if we were to outstrip our own expectations of ourselves. What might we achieve?

And so this film leaves me asking myself and you these questions:

  • What do you want to create?
  • What do you want to be part of?
  • What do you want most for our world and your life?

As Capt. Jean-Luc Picard from the starship Enterprise would say, “Make it so.”

Zoe Weil, President, Institute for Humane Education
Author of Most Good, Least Harm, Above All, Be Kind, and The Power and Promise of Humane Education
My TEDx talk: “The World Becomes What You Teach

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